Drinks at the SoHo Grand

I love cocktails. I'm not ashamed to admit it. They are yummy. Particularly at the SoHo Grand Hotel Bar and Lounge. I went there for a hangover brunch feeling awful and then I met you, Bloody Mary at the SoHo Grand. You were my everything. You picked me up when I was down. You gave me fresh life and restored me to perfect health. You are a miracle and I am so glad you have entered my life.

I'm also a big fan of the SoHo's Perfect Ten which consists of "stolichnaya vanil, pineapple juice, lemon." I don't know what language "stolichnaya vanil" comes from but I'm pretty sure it can best be translated as "nectar of the loins of the gods." It also has a slew of secret ingredients that get me as excited as when I'm on a boat. As you may recall I'm not a big fan of expensive drinks but I lurve the Perfect Ten.

Also, while this is a high class joint I highly recommend going there in jeans and a t-shirt because then everyone else in their suits and party dresses think you're in a band. And that's awesome.

Long Island

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Long Island Wants to Secede
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Big news: Long Island finally wants to succeed at something. Wait, what's that? Oh, they want to secede. Well, that's big news too.

Now I have to admit as a newbie in New York City I haven't entirely pieced together what Long Island is. I think part of it exists at Libation, part of it exists in Italian men in a super tight v-necks, and the rests exists in a land of ridicule created by New Yorkers. Is that right? According to the video above though they seem to be the dicks of NYC and want to beat up New Jersey or Ireland, whichever is closer.

I don't have many Italian man friends in super tight v-necks so in order to explore Long Island I went to Libation one night with my friend Ian (hi Ian! thanks for taking care of my dog!). We met some young ladies who admitted to being "bridge and tunnel" girls. At first I thought that was a sexual thing but since they were all 24 and married I assumed it refers to their eating habits or something.

I'll leave you with a koan: why is Long Island undesirable to live in yet a desirable location to vacation? Someone has to explain that to me. I just don't get you Long Island. Good luck on secession, assuming you exist.