Weekend Bulletin!

Thanks and praises be to the lovely Victoria Gerstman for writing up this weekend's bulletin of events. She is cool and you should take her advice. I often do.

Tonight, dig out your most outrageous duds and pay tribute to New York's unofficial spokeswoman at the The Flame Monster Ball at Mix in Astoria [editor's note: I know, it's Queens. Just keep an open mind for once in your life]. The clientele at Mix aren't exactly known for their restraint [editor's note: neither are you], so tonight's event should be one heck of a time whether you're a Lady Gaga enthusiast or not (do you see how I resisted saying goo goo for Gaga? Do you?)

On Friday and Saturday nights you'll have the once in a lifetime (maybe, probably not) chance to catch Ben Bailey from Cash Cab doing stand up at Comix. Wait. You don't know what Cash Cab is? Why, it is only the most important television show of our time. After Jersey Shore, that is. [last editor's note for realsies: you need to click on that link] Anyway, Ben Bailey is bound to be hilarious.



Saturday evening also brings us the 2nd Annual Cassoulet Cookoff at Jimmy's No. 43. Nothing like a fancy French version of stew to warm your winter-weary bones.

If snobby French stew doesn't quite do it for you, cut your losses and head to the Tribeca 92Y for a Muppets Take Manhattan Sing-a-long. I almost didn't want to tell you guys about this, cuz I don't want to fight the crowds. But I am nice, so here are the details.

When you're done sleeping off your Sunday morning Muppet-hangover, pop over to the NY Historical Society for everyone's favorite way to spend a day - a murder mystery! What fun!

It may be a three day weekend, but that doesn't mean you should spend the whole day on your ratty sofa, reading NYiR archives. Instead, do that, and then get yourself into Manhattan for an MLK-themed walking tour. Led by eighth graders (aww)! Meet at the Ghandi statue in Union Square at 10 am for "A Peace of the Dream: Living MLK's Dream in a Turbulent World."

Times Square Week

Times Square: the center of the universe. This week we'll explore many facets of this remarkable area of New York City. One thing that makes it ridiculous is that no New Yorker ever wants to go there. It's a tourist mecca that has been over-run by some really amazing in-your-face folks (even more so than the YOGs and YOBs of Park Slope!). For example:

The comedy club guy
For some reason these guys are everywhere in Times Square asking you if you like to laugh, waving brochures in your face, and trying to be funny. My favorite is this one guys who just goes, "HAHAHA. HAHAHA. COMEDY CLUB." Simple, to the point, I like it. I'd see his act.

A few years ago my girlfriend was accosted by one of these people. When he asked her, "Do you like to laugh?" she tried to avoid him. He went all Michael Richards and was like, "No I don't think you DO like to laugh. You probably just like to sit at home in the dark and watch sad movies and cry." I'd see his act too.

The tour bus guy
No I don't want to see where Miranda and Carrie had drinks during the Sex and the City movie.

The demo guy
This is the one guy I usually find charming. He'll start off with a "you like hip-hop?" and when you even remotely look at him he gives you his demo for $5. Usually in that order where the demo is in your hand before you even know you're buying it. This can be annoying but some of these CDs are real gems.

When I was still a teenager I came across "Lucky" Logan P. McCoy who sold me on his CD which featured such songs as "I've got a crush!" and "I like you." Those were some hardcore jams about respecting women and handing out CDs on the streets. Thank you Lucky Logan for introducing me to hip-hop.