Monday, April 12, 2010
First the bad news: Sparks has been reported dead. What is Sparks you say? Why only the number one best-selling alcoholic energy drink in the city of New York featuring malt liquor, taurine, caffeine, guarana and ginseng.
Apparently after corporate America (hate you corporate America! you ruin everything!) found out that kids love energy drinks and secretly drinking alcohol and Sparks is an energy drink and has 7% alcohol content in it they were like "Dagnabit! No more caffeine in Sparks!" and MillerCoors was all like, "Yes sir. Right away sir."
So the bad news is that in early 2009 everyone got all sad because Sparks was going to die without it's caffeine boost. Now the good news: we're here a year and a half later to point out that it did not. Sparks may exist in other cities but it in New York you can find it everywhere milk is sold. See?
So while it may not carry the same kick it used to it still tastes gross and makes you look homeless. Available everywhere in NYC.